The 18 Year Old Virgin


by Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

High school has just ended. It's the night after the last day of senior year, and that calls for a big party. Katie, the class brainiac, has decided to lose her virginity at last, to the boy she has been dreaming of since 6th grade. She just goes up to him and asks outright, but he says "no." He says that he likes her and fancies her, but he recently had a traumatic experience with a virgin, and he just can't handle any more drama.

This seems like the end of the world to her, because he's her "soul mate," and he's leaving the next day to spend the entire summer with his dad. She is crushed until her fun-loving friend points out that the dream need not die. The problem has a simple solution. The party has just begun, so Mr. Soul Mate will be there for several more hours. All Katie has to do is lose her virginity to someone else first, then hop in the sack with the dream guy. Surely somebody at the party will volunteer to help her out! Maybe the plot-obligatory "best friend" kid? Maybe the well-hung expert in tantric sex? Maybe the sex addict and his two love-muffins? How about the masochistic exchange student?

She then goes through a chaotic series of misadventures, until ...

Well, I won't spoil the ending for you, because it's kind of cute. Anyway, if you have ever seen a film with a similar set-up, you'll quickly guess how it will turn out. The predictability of the resolution doesn't matter, because this is an entertaining genre film. Is it a great movie? Well, it won't get any Oscar nominations, if that's what "great" encompasses, but it is great in the sense that it does exactly what it is supposed to do.

There are basically only three things you need from a raunchy youthploitation comedy.

1. It needs to be raunchy.

Check. It is filled with non-stop sex and nudity, a lot of it quite kinky, and is not coy about portraying the action. It's not a sex film, but it stops just short.

2. It needs to be funny.

Check. There are several witty lines of dialogue, and all of Katie's sexual misadventures are funny set pieces which range from an attempt to shave herself to her assorted failures at cherry-popping. The sex scenes are not only kinky and sexy, but they are genuinely funny!

3. The acting needs to be good enough so that it does not break the fourth wall.

And check. The kids are unknown, but they are real actors. The leads do a good job with their characters, and some of the background players have excellent comic timing.

A couple of the ideas have been lifted from the American Pie films. For example, Katie ends up in a darkened room giving a blow job to an old man in a coma, thus curing him, which is pretty similar to what happened to Stifler and the granny in American Wedding. Other scenes are similar to ones we have seen elsewhere, but nothing is a direct rip-off, just a variation on some familiar theme. After all, movies have been around a long time, and it's difficult to create anything totally original.

One unique element of this film, as opposed to most raunchy "coming of age" stories, is that the script was written by a woman and directed by another woman. It also tells the story from the point of view of the female virgin and her best female friend. That is a great combination. The women bring a fresh point of view to the story, and can portray raunchy acts unabashedly without losing the basic humanity of the sex and the fundamental warmth of the story. 

Damn! I can't believe I'm writing this about a micro-budget, straight-to-DVD exploitation film that few people have ever heard of, and the rest hated, but I thoroughly enjoyed this, found it sexy, and even laughed out loud a few times. I have been persuaded that more women should make raunchy movies!


No major reviews online, nor will there ever be!


2.6 IMDB summary (of 10)




Nudity: a lot, and in good light as well!

Olivia Alaina May, the virgin, exposed everything sooner or later, but her frontal scene required her to wear a merkin as part of the comedic premise.

Lauren Walsh, the virgin's best friend, gave up the ol' chest.

There are three naked women in a threesome. One is Olivia Alaina May again, this time showing very little. She's joined by two party girls: one is Crystal Baker for sure. The other seems to be porn star Elli Foxx. The two party girls pretty much flash it all, including a shaved frontal from one of them.


Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:


I seem to be the film's only fan, but I thought it was just fine for a STV hard-R variation of the American Pie themes.