Confessions of a Window Cleaner

 (1974)

by Tuna

There were four Confessions films starring Robin Askwith in the same role, a bungling doofus who, for some reason, is irresistible to the ladies. In this first installment of the series he loses his virginity after two abortive attempts. It seems that washing windows not only provides intimate looks into apartments and houses, but often entails servicing the lady of the house along with her windows. Robin is smitten by lady cop Linda Hayden, but doesn't let that get in the way of shagging every other woman in sight. Robin's brother-in-law owns the window washing business and tries to show him the ropes. The boss does just as much fooling around as Robin, although (or maybe because) his wife is very pregnant. Elsewhere, Robin's dotty dad works for the bureau of misplaced items, and brings home anything that strikes his fancy.

Perhaps, like the reviewers and IMDb voters, you do not approve of this kind of foolishness. In that case, you can find a dust-covered copy of Babette's Feast at your local Blockbuster. On the other hand, if you would not only approve of but actually seek out a very naughty version of the Carry On style of humor, this film is at the very top of the line, representing the best of a unique genre in a unique time.

The nudity summary to the right will give you the best idea of what this film is really about. Imagine Benny Hill, albeit with with non-stop nudity and some simulated sex to complement the usual obvious double entendres and general lowbrow silliness. If you enjoy Sir Benny and/or the Carry On series, but wish they were not so tame, you will enjoy this.

 

Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:

C+

This is a competent "couples erotica" film with lots of naked women to watch with your wife or girlfriend. This is an easy C+ as a 1970s British sex romp.

NUDITY REPORT

  • Carole Augustine does full frontal using a sun lamp in her apartment.
  • Andee Cromarty shows breasts as a window dresser being shagged by her boss.
  • Linda Hayden does full frontal as the cop and love interest to Askwith.
  • Christine Donna shows breasts and buns as a stripper enlisted to break Askwith in.
  • Sue Longhurst shows breasts as a willing housewife.
  • Katya Wyeth shows breasts as an avid film fan.
  • Olivia Munday does full frontal when she and Askwith are interrupted by the landlord who's come 'round to take the rent out in trade.
  • Judy Matheson shows breasts and buns trying to make her lover (another woman) jealous.
  • Four women, Glenda Allen, Ava Cadell, Zoe Hendry and Petula Noble do full frontal in a shower scene.

THE CRITICS AND ACADEMIES

TV Guide. "1/4"

NY Times - "should be avoided"

 

THE BOX OFFICE

It was a huge box office success when released, so successful that it spawned three sequels. For a generation of British youngsters, it was THE film to sneak into.

 

THE PEOPLE

   
2.5 IMDB summary (of 10)

 

Since the film is in the top drawer for its genre, the pathetic IMDb score (2.5) is just an indication that the voters see that sort of score as the theoretical maximum for a lowbrow sex romp. But such an appraisal ignores the fact that this film is fun to watch.

DVD INFO

All four Confessions films are available together in a single boxed set from Amazon UK for about 30 quid.