Cougar Club


by Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

Our hero Spence has just graduated from college, is engaged, and is headed for Yale Law if he can get a good recommendation from the senior partner at the law firm where he's interning for the summer. He'd probably be on his way to a prosperous but mundane life if not for his best friend Hogan, a complete slacker whose entire goal in life is to bed as many "experienced" women as possible. Needless to say, Spence's parents and girlfriend want him to cut loose the Hogan anchor in order to achieve his full potential, but Spence is not that kind of guy. He's willing to work hard and study his ass off and even to suck up to disgusting law partners, but Hogan is his friend and he decides to stick with him.

That was either a very good call on his part or a very bad one depending on your attitude toward what happens next. Hogan realizes that there are plenty of other young guys like him who want the unlimited recreational and commitment-free sex available from horny older women, and he knows from personal experience that there are thousands of horny older women who would love to reciprocate the attention they would get from those young men. There could be a lot of profit to be made by anyone who can find a way to bring the two groups together for sportfuckin'. So Hogan talks Spence into forming Cougar Club, in which they charge the male members an annual fee which gives them access to debauched parties organized by our heroes and featuring the older women.

The lads do well. Too well. They make money hand over fist, but complications ensue when some of their Cougars (predatory older women) turn out to be the wives of their law firm's partners. Whoa! That could kill that ol' recommendation letter, eh? Further complications arise when the police come to believe that what they are doing is dangerously close to pimping, and they are arrested. Of course, you know that things will eventually work out in this kind of film.

The two leads are basically unknowns, albeit likeable enough young guys. To offset the anonymity factor, Cougar Club follows the familiar path used by 1980's B-movies to generate marketing topspin by supplementing the obscure lead players with an endless string of available familiar names in cameos and bit parts. The cast is updated a bit from the 80s, since the old stand-bys like Charo, Joe E Ross, Phil Silvers and Foster Brooks are no longer available, but there are plenty of replacements available.

 Faye Dunaway has a small role.

Carrie Fisher has a role so small it is essentially a cameo, although she is billed quite high.

Joe Mantagna plays the "Dean Wormer" character, the senior partner in the law firm. Chyna the wrestler plays the wife of one of the partners. Norm Crosby, now elderly but once the master of the comic malaprop, has one or two lines in an early scene. And so on.

In this and many other ways, Cougar Club shadows the "B" youthploitation films of the 1980s. If it could be a 1980s "A" movie, it would be Risky Business, but it isn't an "A." It's more like a low-rent Golan-Globus copy of Risky Business, filled with nobodies and has-beens and padded out with gross-outs, gratuitous nudity, and Catskills schtick comedy.

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5.6 IMDB summary (of 10)






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    None of the film's female leads show any flesh, but there's quite a bit of incidental nudity which was obviously added to augment the film's titillation value, since 95% of it occurs in tacked-on scenes which have nothing to do with the storyline. The nudity basically comes from three scenes:

    (1) A girl (Nicole Rayburn) who has absolutely nothing to do with the plot and appears in no other scenes comes up to our heroes at graduation and says, "You won the bet, so I have to show you my tits."

    (2) A guy who has nothing to do with the plot is being watched by the divorce lawyers, who are employed by his wife. Our lads are charged with the responsibility of catching and photographing him in flagrante delicto with two topless hookers.

    (3) Spence's parents some home early from a trip, arriving while he is using the house for a Cougar Club party. (More shades of Risky Business.) There is some very brief topless nudity from one woman being fucked against the bay window in their den.

    All three of these scenes are repeated at greater length in the closing credits!


Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:


It is a barely watchable and hastily assembled youthploitation film, very similar to the Golan-Globus efforts from the 80s. I realize that C- constitutes a recommendation, albeit a hesitant one, but could not grade it lower because I never used the fast-forward button ... but I thought about it ... so call it a marginal C-.