Diamond Hunters (2001)
from Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)
|What was the
use of my having come from Oakland it was not natural to have
come from there yes write about it if I like or anything if I
like but not there, there is no there there.
--- GERTRUDE STEIN, Everybody’s
Autobiography, p. 289 (1937, reprinted 1971) ---
Diamond Hunters was probably a big hit in Oakland,
because there isn't much there there either. Two half-brothers
struggle for control of a diamond empire in South Africa. It's your
basic nighttime soap opera with rich people struggling for power,
scheming, and playing musical beds. In fact, it was a mini-series
which has been condensed from 180 minutes to 101 to make it a
Jolene Blalock shows her breasts from the side
in two very dark scenes.
Dynasty and Dallas became popular television shows
because viewers watched them regularly and established an
identification with the characters. Imagine if you had never watched
an episode of Dallas and then just caught one in the middle of the
series. Do you think it would be very interesting? Well, you can
find out if you care to. Duplicate that exact experience by watching
this film full of B-list actors, which has conveniently been transferred to DVD in a TV aspect
ratio, probably from a video tape original, to create the maximum soap
Critics Vote ...
|The meaning of the IMDb
score: 7.5 usually indicates a level of
excellence equivalent to about three and a half stars
from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm
watchability, comparable to approximately two and a half stars
from the critics. The fives are generally not
worthwhile unless they are really your kind of
material, equivalent to about a two star rating from the critics,
or a C- from our system.
Films rated below five are generally awful even if you
like that kind of film - this score is roughly equivalent to one
and a half stars from the critics or a D on our scale. (Possibly even less,
depending on just how far below five the rating
A means the movie is so good it
will appeal to you even if you hate the genre.
B means the movie is not
good enough to win you over if you hate the
genre, but is good enough to do so if you have an
open mind about this type of film.
C means it will only
appeal to genre addicts, and has no crossover
appeal. (C+ means it has no crossover appeal, but
will be considered excellent by genre fans, while
C- indicates that it we found it to
be a poor movie although genre addicts find it watchable).
D means you'll hate it even if you
like the genre.
means that you'll hate it even if
you love the genre.
means that the film is not only
unappealing across-the-board, but technically
inept as well. Any film rated C- or better is recommended for
fans of that type of film. Any film rated B- or better is
recommended for just about anyone. We don't score films below C-
that often, because we like movies and we think that most of
them have at least a solid niche audience. Now that you know
that, you should have serious reservations about any movie below
Based on this description,
this is a D or
Drivel. Basically just a 100 minute nighttime soap opera.
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