Dying God

 (2008)

by Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

(MAJOR SPOILERS)

Filmed in Buenos Aires for about half a million dollars, combining international actors with local performers and some people who seem not to have acted before at all, Dying God is essentially a creature movie about sort of an Amazon version of Sasquatch, called the Kurupi, who is loose and on a murder spree in Buenos Aires one summer. His prey consists of the city's hookers.

And no, it's not pronounced "Crappy." It's COOR-oo-pee.

I suggest you call him Mr. Kurupi.

The monster is the last of his race, and he is accompanied by an Indian shaman, who is the very last member of the tribe that once worshipped the Kurupis as gods. The shaman has no reason to be in the story other than to get captured and provide plot exposition before he dies. After all, how else could anyone know the back story of inarticulate monsters worshipped by a Stone Age tribe unless there is one chatty tribesman left? It seems that the god/monster is dying and knows it. Before he passes on he must mate with a human woman to insure the survival of his species. Unfortunately, that mating process is a rather unfortunate one for the humans involved, since Kurupi's giant penis and its vast quantity of ejaculate will kill any infertile woman, automatically exploding her womb from the inside. (The police seem surprised by this, but I thought every guy had this problem. I guess it's just me and Kurupi.) I'm not sure why the same process does not kill fertile women but, well, it just doesn't. It just hurts a real lot. On the other hand, it hurts a lot less than the eventual delivery process used by Mr. Kurupi on women who bring the baby to term. Since there are no more of his race, he's the designated obstetrician and has to employ some kind of a makeshift bare-handed Caesarian technique. Imagine Mola Ram delivering a baby, and you'll have the general idea.

The most prominent stars of the film are two Americans. James Horan plays the cynical corrupt cop who is trying to solve the murder cases, and wheelchair-bound Lance Henriksen plays the kingpin of the Buenos Aires prostitution scene. Other international performers include former American porn star Misty Mundae (now known as Erin Brown), and the French actress Agathe de la Boulaye, who plays Henriksen's mute stepdaughter and bodyguard.

I don't normally notice the quality of the acting in a film unless it is either brilliant or very bad. I noticed it in this case for the latter reason. The performances from the locals, who take all the minor roles, are so bad as to tear down the fourth wall entirely and constantly remind one that it's just a movie - a bad, low budget B movie. Here is a sample.

Of course, the acting is a pretty good match for the script, the concept, and the special effects. Check out this battle between Henriksen's bodyguard and Mr. Kurupi:

The scene looks comical as is, but is absolutely hilarious when you see it in context, because the Kurupi has survived a hail of bullets which would have felled The Incredible Hulk and has just ripped off a man's head with his bare hands, when Agathe de la Boulaye decides that she's not going to run, but is going to go mano-a-mano with the giant-schlonged monster. Needless to say, she ends up in his mating lair where she is to be groomed for future Kurupi stepmotherhood.

And so it goes until the final showdown in which every main character is killed ... but ... stumbling from the Kurupi's semi-secret lair is a pregnant human woman ...

The End???

The author Graham Greene once noted that he found baseless optimism more poignant and appalling than despair. Since the writer/director's ending for this film anticipates that people will be clamoring for a sequel, Greene must be wincing in the afterlife.

DVD info not yet available.

THE CRITICS AND ACADEMIES

No English-language reviews online.

 

 

 

 

THE PEOPLE

   
n/a IMDB summary (of 10)
  not enough votes for a score

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE BOX OFFICE

Straight to video

 

 

 

 

 

NUDITY REPORT

  • Sura Sepulveda, Natasha Drisan, Victoria Maurette and one other woman exposed their breasts
  • Misty Mundae showed a fleeting glimpse of one breast in a downblouse-type context.

 

 

 

 

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Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:

D

Without the bad acting it would be a C-, just another cliché-ridden genre film with a poorly costumed monster. The performances from the minor characters lower it to "unwatchable."