The Informers

 (2009)

by Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

Death is almost always a tragedy. The death of a 25-year-old is beyond tragic. But there is a silver lining in the cloud which surrounded the heroin overdose of Brad Renfro.

He never lived to see himself in this film.

It's not just that he looked 40 and bloated, although that would have been enough to cause him some significant suffering, but the real pain would have come when he came down from his heroin high for some rare moments of clarity, at which time he would have found himself watching this with his friends and would have thought, "What am I doing in this place? What is this movie I'm watching? God it sucks. ... Holy shit. That's me up there. I'm in this suckfest."

The Informers is based on a novel by Bret Easton Ellis, who also co-wrote the screenplay. I haven't read that book and, on the assumption that it might resemble this movie, however vaguely, I never will.

From the "cream of the crop" critics summarized at Rotten Tomatoes, there is precisely one positive review, and several of the negative reviewers gave the film the lowest possible score.

And they must have been in a generous mood.

Here's what the film is about: some assholes in L.A. do some stuff. Then some other assholes do some other unrelated stuff. There are some vague connections between the segments. The end.

There's no point, other than that life is boring and has no point, and there isn't any humor, black or otherwise, to assist in establishing that point. There isn't much of a plot, either. Although the film is supposed to take place in the 1980s, the period detail is almost non-existent except for the obligatory Reagan TV appearances and the fact that people are just discovering AIDS. Although many top actors are in the cast, most of the "acting" consists of delivering lines in a hollow voice while looking off into the middle distance and trying to pose profoundly, as if in an SCTV parody of a Bergman movie.

Few of the characters have any kind of arc. Not that you would care about those characters, for they are all despicable or pathetic, without exception, and they are all bored with life. Some of them are merely pathetic, spoiled, contemptuous and pretentious, and are therefore less reprehensible than the ones who kidnap children or seek sex with minors.

But for our purposes there is something far worse than the fact that the characters are bored.

They are boring.


Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a:

D

Unwatchable, unless you want to see the nudity, which is impressive. The IMDb score is fishy, to say the least. Not that it is inconsistent with every other measurement.

DVD Blu-Ray

THE CRITICS AND ACADEMIES

2.5 Roger Ebert (of 4 stars)
1.5 James Berardinelli (of 4 stars)
14 Rotten Tomatoes  (% positive)
5 RT elite critics  (% positive)
20 Metacritic.com (of 100)

THE PEOPLE

   
7.5 IMDB summary (of 10)
C+ Yahoo Movies

THE BOX OFFICE

Box Office Mojo. It Although it was distributed to 482 theaters, it grossed only $300,000 on its opening weekend, and was pulled immediately after those three days.

 

NUDITY REPORT

  • Amber Heard shows her breasts several times, and full body nudity from the side. One other woman is seen topless is a foursome with Heard and two guys.
  • Mel Raido does full frontal and rear nudity. he is in bed with a naked young man and woman, neither of whom is credited. (Full-frontal nudity from both of them.)
  • Austin Nichols - butt from the side in a post-sex scene with Kim Basinger (who remains covered)

 

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