Live Once, Die Twice


by Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

The only reason I watched this film in the first place is that Kellie Martin had a sex scene. That turned out to be a red herring. Oh, she appeared to be completely naked, but you can't see any fun stuff, thanks to mean old Mr. Editor. Kellie also took a shower on camera and changed her clothes on camera, each time keeping the goodies just out of sight.

"You're thinking, "Dude, what did you expect? It's a TV movie." I know that. I had the same thought ... until I saw a scene in a strip club which demonstrated that nudity was obviously NOT off-limits. Patricia Stasiak danced around topless for about a minute. Therefore, it was just Kellie who had no intention of getting naked. I guess that's never going to happen. To my knowledge she has never done any nudity of any kind, and the clock is ticking.

You know who she is, even if you don't immediately recognize the name. She was on ER for a few years as Lucy Knight, then quit the series to finish off her Yale BA in Art History. Since then she's been the star of those Mystery Woman movies on the Hallmark Network, and has even directed a couple of them. (If, like me, you've never actually seen one of them, one IMDb wag suggests that they're like Murder She Wrote without the senility.)

As for the movie itself, it's a plot-heavy made-for-TV effort made on a shoestring budget, but shot in some attractive Montreal locations.

A woman (Kellie Martin) loses her realtor husband in a boating accident. Some evil dudes appear on her doorstep and tell her that hubby owed them five million dollars and she had better find it, or else! She then realizes that either hubby was a really good real estate agent, or he had a criminal sidelight.

She has little luck finding any clues to hubby's secrets except for a letter to a guy in Detroit she never heard of. She drives to the address in Detroit where she meets another woman with the exact same story as her own: husband was always on the road and died the same time as Kellie's hubby. Were the two men partners in the secret criminal enterprise, or was their connection even more sinister? Were they killed together? Were they even killed at all? Was the dead husband really a bad guy or a federal agent working deep undercover?

The two women hire a cynical old bounty hunter to help them unravel the mystery before the baddie reappears to claim the money or a pound of flesh.

You think I'm spoiling the movie for you? That is only the set-up. The real plot hasn't even started yet, and it gets WAY more complicated. In fact, I got lost on some of the wherefores and kept thinking that some of the details were added only to make the plot more intricate, and were not consistent with the established goals of the characters.

If you get started on this film, you may find the serpentine plot intriguing enough to make it all the way through the movie, but a reasonably clever script is all it has. The execution is mediocre and there is no good reason why you should seek it out in the first place.



* bare bones

* no widescreen

* no features






No major reviews online.


5.2 IMDB summary (of 10)


Made for TV.


  • Patricia Stasiak shows her breasts
  • See the main commentary for additional information.


Our Grade:

If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to read the explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by our definition, a C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a watchable but uninspiring