Tobe Hooper's Night Terrors

Yes, this is from the same guy who once made "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", but this flick doesn't even come close. It is so terrible that it is rated 2.5 in the IMDb, which I still find too high. The story takes place in Alexandria, Egypt and deals with some ancient god on one side and on the other side with things that supposedly happened to Marquis the Sade in the 18th century but continue in the present. Robert Englund plays both de Sade and his contemporary descendant. Then Genie comes into town, played by Zoe Trilling, the daughter of a sort of born-again Christian archeologist. Genie however is not a religious zealot and goes into town wearing skimpy clothes and soon gets in trouble in a marketplace where she has to be rescued by some good looking hunk.

Genie then starts having fantasies about her rescuer and in her dreams she sees him as this specimen of the homo equestris cockerectus or the hard-on horseman if you prefer. At this point the supposedly frightening film has already become completely ridiculous, certainly by this gratuitous shot, and this is clearly not Robert Englund, as claimed by a reviewer in the IMDb. What is even more irritating is the fact that although Zoe Trilling shows her big breasts and buns, they are never clear, let alone a clear full frontal shot like the horseman. Where's equality of the sexes when you need it?

NUDITY REPORT

see the main commentary

VHS info from Amazon.

Widescreen anamorphic, 1.85:1
no meaningful features

Both Englund and Trilling put in exceptionally bad performances. According to the IMDb Zoe even quit acting and is now a teacher at the American Ballroom Theater in NYC. I do hope she's better at dancing than at acting. The plot is ludicrous and full of holes. Genie has to be punished because she resembles someone from the past who pissed off Englund, but finally he's punishing (two images of collage three included especially for Hankster) her for something she had absolutely nothing to do with as well. And then there's also a snakewoman, played by Tamar Shamir. I'm still not sure what her role in the story was. If by now you don't understand what I'm going on about, then you have exactly the same feeling I had after watching this flick.

The Critics Vote

no major reviews online

The People Vote ...

With their votes ... IMDB summary: IMDB readers say 2.5 of 10.

IMDb guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of excellence, about like three and a half stars from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm watchability, about like two and a half stars from the critics. The fives are generally not worthwhile unless they are really your kind of material, about like two stars from the critics. Films under five are generally awful even if you like that kind of film, equivalent to about one and a half stars from the critics or less, depending on just how far below five the rating is.