The Order (2001) from Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski) |
This Jean-Claude Van Damme film not only stars the
Muscles from Brussels, but was written by him as well, and it includes
some truly twisted stuff. The premise behind it is that some of the early Christian crusaders became disenchanted with the hypocrisy of their religion, or any religion which exhorts people to murder in the name of religion. They abandoned Christianity and formed their own splinter sect, and were actually joined by Moslems and Jews in forming a kind of pansectarian amalgam. It seems that this particular sect still exists today, albeit as an underground cult, and they have treasure rooms, secret rites, lost scriptures, liturgical robes, apocalyptic predictions, and what have you. Your basic Ali Baba and Sinbad meet Conan the Barbarian and Genghis Khan in the 21st century kind of plot. No gimmicks there, just everyday human interaction on the most natural level. You must admit that Mr Van Damme has quite an imagination. The priests of this cult wear robes that look like those worn by Catholic priests on holy days that call for red vestments. With modifications, of course. Instead of the traditional Catholic symbols and lettering, they have their own distinctive iconography. So imagine a Catholic priest wearing robes with the symbols of Batman or Captain Marvel. One other major difference - the priests carry swords as well. Forget that "turn the other cheek" crap. |
There isn't really much of a plot - it's just a flimsy excuse to jump between the action scenes - and what little plot there is can best be described as utter lunacy. Ya get yer basic underground religious cults, ticking time bombs, apocryphal scriptures, "end of days" predictions, ethnic cleansing, and soldiers of fortune aligned with the cult leaders. (Although it goes without saying that the mercenaries and the religious nutbags will end up double crossing each other.) |
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The distinguished Hasidic scholar prepares for some intense Talmudic study, followed by some serious ass-kicking. | The one thing I like about
Van Damme is his offbeat sense of humor.
Charlton Heston plays in a movie with a character named Ben-Ner. (Actually Ben Cross plays this part.) |
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The film does have some positives.
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