Savage Beach

Savage Beach (1989) is one of two Andy Sidaris films being released this week.

These formula films typically have explosions, high-tech toys, fights, guns, and lots of attractive bosoms attached to women who can deliver dialogue with some believability. This one was the same, except that it had more plot, and less in the way of sex scenes. Hope Marie Carlton, and Dona Speir play federal drug agents who fly a charter airline for cover. Patty Duffek and Lisa London work with them, and run a restaurant. Carlton and Speir are sent by their boss on a mercy mission to fly a serum to the Marshall islands.

Meanwhile, there is a very complicated plot about the US helping the Philippines to recover some gold taken by the Japanese in WW II. I can't even begin to explain all the different forces that take part in this, but the representative of the Philippine government, together with his girlfriend, Teri Weigel, are actually members of the communist party, and want the gold for their own cause. A storm causes the federal agents to crash on an obscure island, and eventually to find a WW II vintage Japanese warrior still living there. Then, of course, the rest of the cast shows up, because this is where the gold is. That should be enough for you to make a rent/buy/ignore decision.

NUDITY REPORT

We see breasts from Carlton, Speir, Duffek and London in a spa. Later, we see breasts from Duffek and London changing. Carlton and Speir have additional breast exposure changing in the airplane, then swimming on the beach. The long nude scenes are from Wasa in a swimming pool, then after she gets out, topless all the while, and Weigel undressing and making love twice.

As far as I am concerned, you know what to expect from a Sidaris film before you even read the box, and this one is no different. If you enjoy mindless entertainment from time to time, this one works. If you don't like his other films, you won't like this one.

DVD info from Amazon.

Full-screen format, but very good quality
audio commentary by Andy and Arlene Sidaris
various interviews and trailers

Scoop's comments:

Sidaris's films are exactly what they should be - a glossy context (or maybe the correct word is "pretext") for really great looking women to show their breasts in good light. As our unofficial role model, Joe Bob Briggs, put it, "Sidaris is by far the finest director working with Playmates, machine guns, and exploding helicopters today"

Playboy should have thought of this. Most of their Playmates aspire to acting or modeling or singing careers, so movies are an opportunity for them to show what they can do, and an opportunity for their fans to see more of them without their clothing. Andy Sidaris saw that Playboy was leaving this money on the table, and he scooped it up.

The Critics Vote

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The People Vote ...

IMDB summary. IMDb voters score it 3.4/10

IMDb guideline: 7.5 usually indicates a level of excellence, about like three and a half stars from the critics. 6.0 usually indicates lukewarm watchability, about like two and a half stars from the critics. The fives are generally not worthwhile unless they are really your kind of material, about like two stars from the critics. Films under five are generally awful even if you like that kind of film, equivalent to about one and a half stars from the critics or less, depending on just how far below five the rating is.