The Stud (1978) from Johnny Web (Uncle Scoopy; Greg Wroblewski)

"I can review that film in two notes, Wink":

Joan Collins.

It's one of those films based on a Jackie Collins book, starring Jackie's older sister, Joan. Like everything else featuring Joan in the 70s and 80s, she was essentially playing Alexis on Dynasty (which, in turn, was probably herself).

Although she played the femme fatale, Joan was at least 45 years old in this movie. That's based on her official birth year of 1933. Only the Lord knows her correct birth year, or even her correct birth century. The 20th is the best guess, but is by no means a certainty. You have to be a bit suspicious because her first glossies were shot by Matthew Brady.

That's quibbling on my part, though, because she looked sexy enough, and was shot in soft focus, so she photographed about the same as she did when she was 30, assuming that photography had been invented by that time.

But I digress.

I learned something very important from this film. Remember how everyone thought London was so swinging back then? It turns out that only about 25 people were having fun. No matter which club people went to in this movie, the same two dozen people were dancing. It would have been better for the audience if they had been good dancers, but they did seem to be having fun.

Collins plays the decadent wife of a rich, boring businessman. She chooses a handsome young man to be her personal stud. She trains him to behave in society, and mainly to fuck and suck, and she supports him in lavish style. In return for her largesse, she expects him to service her 24/7. Stud-boy is tired of this life. In fact, he's downright miserable, so he is trying to figure out how to get out of the arrangement.

{SPOILERS} Collins's husband figures out what is going on, cuts Collins off penniless, and sends some thugs to beat the snot out of Stud-boy {END SPOILERS} I guess the big dramatic point is that The Stud gets beat up for something he didn't want to do in the first place. That is supposed to be ironic and all, but if you think about it, he endured one beating, and was then free of Joan Collins for a lifetime.

Well worth it, in my opinion.

In terms of the chronology of the characters' lives, this is the prequel to the cinema classic The Bitch. It takes place earlier, and was made before the other film. Collins plays the same character in both movies. While that other Collins film is rated a bitchy 2.6 at IMDb, this one is rated a studly 2.8. To help you see that in perspective, Police Academy 6 is rated 2.7.  If these two Joan Collins films had enough votes, they would be rated the 30th and 41st worst movies of all time at IMDb.

There are two reasons why this film is slightly better than The Bitch:

1) The story has no merit, and is still padded out with many minutes of disco dancing, but unlike The Bitch, this film is comprehensibly edited.

2) This film uses real disco hits instead of songs that sound similar to major songs from the era. The sound track of The Stud is pretty much Disco's Greatest Hits, so they didn't have anything of much merit left when they made The Bitch.